Think back !

To me, I am a poor man, when I was young age 7-9 years old  ( late 2001) in one of the Province between Kompong Chnang and Battambang, Cambodia. I had never kept on it to live in city ( Phnom Penh City). My parents , especially my father very wanted me to live in city ,for he wanted me to keep studying but I always declined him. Studying in countryside , I had thought it was not good thing to me and not necessary. After 2 years , my father passed a way and then my siblings and I lived with my mother ,she could not keep an eye on us anymore ,for she is a farmer and could not earn enough money . when my family had been doing his funeral , my uncle asked for me to live with him and then I thought I couldn't live here( in my hometown). Fair enough, after seventh day of my father funeral I went to city with my aunt  who is my mother's elder sister send me to live with my uncle (my father's elder brother). I didn't know that time why I decided to live with my uncle and I never thought I want to live in City.

In early 2002, I was sent to Chak Angre Primary School, Phnom Penh city, when I had shaved head ,for my father passed a way ( son have to shave of the head). Without knowing friends ,however, I felt very fearful with new friends,teachers,places but in the first day at school maybe 40-50 students who were in class very friendly to me seemed I was their friend. This made my feeling  from fearful to excited.Living with uncle family, I was so afraid because I never lived with him and his three children before. He supported everything ,money , place,material, so on. The first year I lived with them without thinking anything, I slept for long hours a day after came back from school ( grade 3). Just slept and ate ,nothing to do. One day my uncle came back from his workplace and I was sleeping , he said to me why don't you carry your book to read boy ! Don't waste your time for free! I listened him,but I didn't do anything because I myself thought that I was young,so it was not important to me. By spending his money, sometimes I couldn't support my stomach, because it was not enough for my studying, but it was better than I lived at my homeland. When I lived with him and his three children,   I was given a hard time by his children a lots. They blamed me why I didn't help something in the house such washing the dish , cleaning house. I was really angry myself that I did not give them a hand, but since when I decided to do this everyday. Although I tried to do so . Now and  then, they still gave me a hart time ( sometimes I cried alone on my bed at night). Living with them several years , I dared not to do anything whenever I wanted to do what I want . I thought that they wanted me to do that thing either , yet I did not have the guts to tell them for what I wanted ,especially with my studying...( to be continuous)